Author Name:
Shayna Gothard Kaufmann
Book Title:
Embrace the Middle: A Woman’s Guide to Mindfully Navigating the Challenges, Celebrating the Joys, and Finding Power in Midlife.
Website URL:
Social Media Links:
Instagram @ShaynaKaufmann
LinkedIn: Shayna Gothard Kaufmann
Facebook: Embrace The Middle
Amazon book link:
What is your book about and when was it published?
Embrace the Middle, published in September 2024, is a warm, wise, and empowering guide for women navigating the often-overlooked—and profoundly transformative—season of midlife.
Blending clinical insight, Zen teachings, original research from over 600 midlife women worldwide, and deeply personal stories, psychologist and meditation teacher Dr. Shayna Kaufmann offers readers a refreshing alternative to the tired narrative of midlife crisis and decline. Instead, Embrace the Middle reveals this life stage as a portal to greater authenticity, freedom, and power.
Through mindfulness-based tools, honest reflection, and soulful encouragement, Shayna guides women to face midlife’s changes—including menopause, shifting roles, and identity evolution—with presence, grace, and self-compassion. She also shines a light on the quieter gifts of this time: increased resilience, self-awareness, wisdom, ease, and the emergence of a wiser, more authentic self.
The book closes with a bold invitation: to rewrite the story of midlife, break the silence around aging and menopause, and step into this chapter as a vibrant, meaningful, and liberating part of a woman’s life.
While written especially for women in midlife, Embrace the Middle is also a valuable resource for men seeking to better understand the women in their lives, and for younger women who want to feel inspired—not fearful—about what lies ahead.
What inspired you to write your book?
My own messy midlife chapter was the inspiration. I found myself in the midst of a perfect storm of changes—menopause, my kids leaving for college, my parents declining and eventually passing, and noticeable shifts in my physical functioning and appearance. I was searching for a healthy way to navigate it all.
The answer actually came to me during a silent meditation retreat, when I experienced a hot flash. The circumstances of the retreat (i.e., sitting still in silence) precluded me from my typical instinctual reactions to a hot flash – complaining and trying to seek comfort. So, instead of fighting the hot flash, I stayed present with it—and discovered, in real time, how much easier it was to accept the experience than fight it. That moment sparked an “aha” for me: What if I could bring that same spirit of gentle acceptance (i.e, embracing) to the rest of the changes I couldn’t control?
That simple but powerful shift became a guiding intention in my life and ultimately the foundation of my Embrace the Middle business and book.
What success did you achieve with your book that you’d like to share?
I’ve been thrilled by how well the book has done—and continues to do. I’ve given over 25 book talks which has spawned further invitations to share the message. It won a Gold Book Award, and has nearly 60 five-star Amazon reviews. I’ve also been interviewed on TV in three states, which has helped spread the message even further.
But what means the most to me are the conversations that have unfolded at book talks and events. The topics I explore in the book—misconceptions about menopause, invisibility, multigenerational caregiving demands, relationship and identity change, and our quiet growth—are resonating deeply. When I hear that the book has helped shift someone’s perspective or brought more presence and ease into their life, that’s the real gold for me.
How long did this take to achieve? What steps did you take that helped?
Most of the momentum happened in the first 3–4 months after launch, but I started building support well before that. Months ahead of publication, I reached out to my tribe—friends, family, and organizations I was connected to—to let them know the book was coming and to invite their support.
Whenever I had existing travel plans, I’d reach out to contacts in those areas to see if they could host a book talk, recommend a group to speak to, or connect me with media leads like local TV. That grassroots, relational approach really helped.
While I maintain a social media presence and send out a monthly newsletter, the greatest traction has come from speaking directly to groups of women. There’s something uniquely powerful about being in conversation—where the themes of the book come alive and resonate most deeply.
Was there anything about the process that didn’t help?
I’m still on the fence regarding social media. I invested in assistants at different points, but it is difficult to gauge the return. It definitely helped in the beginning but requires persistence and thick skin. Veering from my target audience simply to have more opportunities to share my book was not especially helpful. While the themes are broadly relevant, the most resonance and impact happen when I’m speaking directly to women in their 40s, 50s, and 60s, and address the nuanced differences between those I decades.
I also appeared on a number of podcasts, which were valuable in helping me articulate my message and share my story. But from a business perspective, it wasn’t always clear how much those opportunities moved the needle in terms of book sales and business bookings.
If the NFAA and/or our community was instrumental in helping you achieve this success, how?
I always gain invaluable information at the annual conference in May. I’ve attended several years in a row and learned more each time since I was at different points in my book journey. Stephanie and the presenters address so many different aspects of the writing and marketing journey – parts I had no clue about. I was so impressed with Stephanie that I ended up choosing to have Authority Publishing publish my book. They were wonderfully supportive in helping push me towards the finish line.
What’s next for you?
I would love for my book and the option to choose the path of gentle acceptance of midlife changes to reach more women. My book talks almost always end up in rich conversations amongst women. I love holding space for women to talk about this stuff in a supportive environment. We need it. My focus has also shifted to include resuming my workshops and meditation teaching, under my Embrace the Middle business.
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